Liander
New Member
Lead me, follow me, or get out of my way.
Posts: 430
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Post by Liander on Dec 7, 2009 19:21:58 GMT -8
Give your soul to me for eternity. Release your life to begin another time with her. End your grief with me, there's another way. Release your life ... Take your place inside the fire with her. Everyone who's ever been important to me has vanished from my life. All my sires, all my friends. I have but a single person left in this pitiful excuse of an unlife, and everyone, including me, knows that she's better off without me. I... don't have a purpose anymore. My "clan" is a joke, and everyone knows it. I don't know what I'm doing right now. Not sure why I'm writing this. My thoughts are disjointed, scattered. I think... I just need to say it. To anyone who will listen. I'm so tired. I know, I've brought it all on myself. Karma's a bitch, isn't it? I don't expect, nor deserve, any sort of pity or sympathy. Most of you hate me, and for good reason. I mean, really, what have I done to deserve anything but animosty? I begged for this unlife. I would have killed for it if I had to. But for what end? Is this what eternity is going to be like? If so, heaven or hell, I don't care which, just take me. End it now. I see no purpose, no final revelation here. My unlife has come to me blogging just so I can talk. How pathetic is that? The sunrise looks beautiful right now. Or maybe a bullet injected with holy water. I don't care anymore. I just want an end. Or a purpose. All or nothing. If there is a God, I pray, no, beg, that you show me why I'm here. Show me why I exist, show me your "plan." Give me a reason to not walk into the sunrise. Please.
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Post by Arlana Rose on Dec 7, 2009 19:48:07 GMT -8
Li, I tried to talk to you earlier and you did the same thing I did with many other people I've met. You pushed me away. It doesn't matter to me if you're just going to scream and yell, but for the love of all that is holy don't push the people that want to be there for you away. You're going through a rough time, but so are others and until you talk to someone, you won't ever know where the light at then end of the tunnel is. You want to talk, you know my cell, if not, well don't bother then.
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rel
New Member
byrren jous ninta yibinss wun ninta xo'a ulu kl'ae vel'bol zhah udosst..er'griff l' seke ph' shebali
Posts: 1,013
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Post by rel on Dec 7, 2009 20:07:19 GMT -8
I find it interesting that you're getting irritated that he's pushing you away. That's a normal reaction when mourning for someone you love. The patience needs to come from you, not him.
...but I digress. Liander. We're not friends. I hardly know you, so this is just my personal opinion that you can listen to or throw darts at...but it seems it took you a long time to find a sire that you truly felt like you should have been turned by, and now she's gone...that loss would rock anyone's lil world, and being immortal ours lasts a pretty long time. So grieve. Mourn. Let yourself be pulled into the earth and rest for a few months, or kill scores of humans to satiate your pain, chase hunters, go friggin crazy, but let yourself...
Your clan and all the rest is just distracting you from mourning. What I'd hate to see...what I see more often than not in this city...is you doing a rash thing like walking into the sun without taking the time to think it through. Every single vampire within our city has needed the earth at one point or another and if they say they haven't they're either very very young or lying. The earth is what binds us, it's where we gain strength...sure, we can all black out rooms now so that I can still curl up in a king sized bed within my manor, but that feeling of sinking deep within the arms of the mother earth and resting? There's nothing like it. Once it's zombie free. So GO friggin crazy and kill to your hearts content, rip the throats of scores of humans, and then rest...
Just mah two cents...
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◞◯◟
New Member
IGN: upir
Posts: 759
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Post by ◞◯◟ on Dec 7, 2009 20:18:44 GMT -8
I sincerely attempted to read this and take it all in, but happened to be interrupted by spasms of laughter at multiple points....
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BlackBlank
New Member
Whatever happened to class?
Posts: 369
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Post by BlackBlank on Dec 7, 2009 20:43:34 GMT -8
I find wisdom in rel's words, brothermine. I know we both feel similar in greivance about dear Pea's too-sudden departure, but we have eternity to accept that fact. Even if it seems impossible now. This harsh city is always throwing curveballs and driving some of the greatest pyres that ever were out of it day by day.
Anyway. Do what you have to do, dear. It'll be alright. Like I told you, it's not the end of the road.
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